I ran... and cried... and ran...

I've had a couple of pretty rough days with my Mom.  Yesterday one of her doctors called to tell her the results from her last body scan.  It showed some additional tumors on the liver and in the stomach cavity as well as a 15 cm tumor on her ovary - about as big as a grape fruit.  Today we met with an Oncologist to get some answers to our questions.  We mainly had one question, which was if they could remove the tumor on the ovary that has been growing quickly, but unfortunately that doesn't seem to be an option since there are so many others and it would mean that she would have to put her treatments on hold in order to do so.  The plan is to continue her latest form of chemo that she only has had three treatments of so far and hope that they will make a difference.

Yesterday I ran... I dropped Skyler off at gymnastics and ran for 1 1/2 hour straight on the trails in the woods that surround our city.  I ran... and cried... and ran until I was feeling stronger and appreciating everything beautiful around me.  All of a sudden the ground was all wet and soggy and my pink running shoes were more brown than anything else.  But instead of getting upset about it I truly enjoyed the cold muddy water seeping in through my toes and playing with my senses.  By the time I was done running I had been reminded of how darn amazing life is and how we better enjoy it while we're here!

Today after our (not so uplifting) talk with the Oncologist my Mom reached her hand out to me and said "Take my hand and promise that we're going to give it all and try everything we can".  And this is how we continue... there is no other option!

This picture shows my Mom when we picked her up after one of her chemo treatments.  I'd like to think that seeing her grandchildren in the back seat helps lifting her mood...

I admire the strength and positive spirit of my Mom.  I don't even think the doctors know how to respond to her sometimes.  They probably think she's in denial.  Believe me, she's very aware of what a difficult form of cancer this is to treat.  But I still have to believe that if anybody can beat this, it is my Mother!